Friday, January 27, 2012

Where are all the Titus 2 Women?

I will admit, I have been struggling lately but it is a different sort of struggle than normal for me. Normally I am struggling with homeschool or with housework, but not this time. I am so frustrated at the lack of real, in person Titus 2 women. Where are they? Where are the women in my church that are to teach me that yes, the Bible says homeschooling is God's plan? To teach me that yes, God wishes for wives/mothers to stay home, to be a keeper AT home? To teach me that as a daughter of the King that I am to dress modestly, to submit to my husband in all (biblical) things and that I am to love my children? Sometimes I feel so alone in the real world because I cannot name one person in my church that holds these beliefs right now. The friend I had at church that held most of these same beliefs is now out of town with her husband's work. I do have a friend that holds everyone of these beliefs, but she attends another church and lives in another town. Ugh, it is so frustrating to me. Please don't think that I mean to put down the women at my church, I don't. They are God fearing, God loving women who seek to follow His word, but it seems they are oblivious to commands regarding the beliefs I have mentioned. Most of the women in our church work outside the home, even the older women. I only know of one other homeschooling family. I am the only woman in our church that consistently wears skirts/dresses instead of jeans/pants. Many do not know how to show respect/submission to their own husbands. Sometimes I just want to scream, but other times it makes me question my beliefs. If I am the only one, maybe I am wrong. However, I don't believe that, not for one minute.

There are supposed to be Titus 2 women in the church, however I recently had a pastor's wife ask my opinion for a ladies Bible study and I recommended a Titus 2 study; she didn't understand what I meant until I explained it to her. How sad!

Titus 2:3-5

3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; 4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

KJV

We are called to homeschool our children.
Deuteronomy 6:6-7
6 And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: 7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.

KJV
You can also read 2 Timothy 3:14, Ephesians 6:4, Isaiah 38:19, Mark 9:42, Romans 6:16 and Proverbs 22:6 for a few more verses about the parent's responsibility to train up their children. (I have more but will stop here for now.)

We are to dress modestly and differently from men and the rest of the world, and we are to submit to our husbands.
1 Peter 3:1-6

3 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.

KJV


1 Timothy 2:9-12

9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works. 11 Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. 12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

KJV

There are more verses and I will share if someone really wants to know, but otherwise I will leave it at these.
 
How am I to learn how to physically be a Titus 2 woman if I have no example? More importantly, how do I do it in a church that doesn't hold these beliefs? I can't instruct the younger women without expressing my beliefs, and that has caused me to consider stepping down from my teaching position in our youth ministry. Right now I teach a small group of 9-10th grade girls, but they keep asking my beliefs on touchy subjects (such as dating) and I have to be honest with them, even if it goes against the majority's beliefs. I am still praying about that decision, and really that isn't the main point of this post anyway.  (I'm not even sure I believe in youth groups but that is for another post entirely. I see their need in certain instances, otherwise, certain kids would NEVER hear the word of God.)
 
Back to topic, I just want to yell it out sometimes, "WHERE ARE YOU TITUS 2 WOMEN?"  And, why aren't you following the Word of God?
 
I thank God for the encouragement I receive online through wonderful, like-minded blogs.
 
Blessings,
Rashel

I couldn't get the link up to work but I am linking up with 

8 comments:

  1. Rashel, I understand and share your frustration on this topic! I am a first generation Christian and also the youngest mother/wife in our church; I would love to receive godly counsel from older wives/mothers. However this cannot be: even our pastors wife works outside the home. Our family is also the only one in attendance who dresses ourselves according to Gods will. It is confusing for our children.

    For now I am blessed that the Lord has directed me towards godly women online, who encourage me to seek the Lords will in my life and to to live according to what the Bible teaches. Lately I am in prayer asking God to help me to be content with that.

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  2. Rashel,
    Your question really causes me to think. I consider myself to be a Titus 2 woman and even in our church it is a rare thing.
    We don't currently homeschool, but I am very pro-homeschool and the Lord may lead us there. Actually we do teach our son many things at home, so we must be partial homeschoolers :)
    I have developed some wonderful relationships with younger women who seek more than the world has to offer.
    The most valuable thing I have to offer is encouragement to those who want to be at home.
    I have helped a young mom get started in canning and gardening, which was very satisfying for both of us.
    I gave a beginning reading book to a young mom and encouraged her to teach her little ones to read.
    I find that in being Titus 2, it is important to work with young women at the pace they're walking and not to be too aggressive.
    I keep a library of books about wives submitting to husbands, frugal living, raising godly children, etc. so I have good materials to loan.
    I have never heard a sermon or Bible study about being Titus 2, however. That is something I need to pray about.
    I pray that the Lord will bring a precious older women into your life and in turn will allow you the joy of encouraging other wives and moms..........Denise

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  3. I know how you feel. I have never had any in any of the churches we went to. I never even grew up in one. I learned everything I have from books. I have one friend who believes the same way I do that lives by me. I think the churches have let alot of worldly ideas creep in. They only want to live certain parts of the Bible. When my husband pastored he told me it was my responsility to teach the younger ones the right way to live and be keepers at home. Most of the women thought I was crazy. I stood firm on what I believe, even if no one else does God knows you are doing your best. And teaching your daughter and sons is what is going to change the church. We have to stay strong for them. I had a friend who was just like us and taught her children the same way. Then one day they had some financail trouble and she decided she didn't like being at home poor. She went to school and became a nurse. It has ruined her family. I would rather live the way I am than give up and my family be ruined. We have never had alot but I am happy and content. Thats the main thing. You keep it up it will be worth it. There is only one other family in the church we go to that stays home and homeschools. Its sad too cause we have over 100 people in our church. Our pastors wife is an example to us too. She is very submissive to her husband and his helpmet. Even though our church has S>S> and Youth group we do not let our children attend. They accept that thats how we are. I will pray for you. Keep your chin up. You have the best job in the world. Sorry this is so long...

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  4. I recently blogged on this very topic, Rashel. I had very few Titus 2 women in my life as a young mother. So I have resolved to be a Titus 2 woman now - to the younger moms that are in my life. Hence the "birth" of my blog. :)
    Thanks for this timely reminder.

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  5. I know--I've been feeling this way also! I think they are all online! :) The conclusion I have come to, is to stand firm in my beliefs and be an example to other women. I don't know what else to do. It's very frustrating. I notice a lot of women in the church being bossy to their husbands, and it infuriates me!

    I really think that you can be a great example to those youth that you are a leader to, and it would be a shame for you to step down if that is what God is calling you to do. There are so few of us anymore, and we can be light to those young girls who wouldn't get the example otherwise.

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  6. You are not alone…I have been in the same situation most of my life. I am at a church now that adheres to these principles, but sadly we will be leaving in 7 months to move to OK. I am very sad about this mainly because of leaving this type of church situation. Sometimes though even in the wonderful church I am apart of…mothers are so busy and have relationships built already with other church members before I came that it is hard at times to feel totally one of them. What you may not realize is that you just may be the Titus 2 woman God has placed in your church. Older doesn't always have to mean age…it can be spiritual maturity. You are a Titus 2 woman because of what the Lord has revealed to you. What a wonderful example you would be to other women. I think about how different I would have been had God not showed me these same areas…and now I am realizing…it is my job to show others. Many of us are first generation Christians in this area living in a culture that has forsaken God for far too long. God has shown us the light in His great mercy, so that we can show it to others. May the Lord show you how He desires you to be salt and light to the ladies you come in contact with. What a beautiful example you would be to them.

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  7. I really understand your frustration. I recently moved, but at my old church I had a mentor. Now I feel like I'm sort of on my own, and desperately desire some likeminded fellowship and some Titus 2 mentors. Hopefully we'll learn from this and be around to mentor the next generation of wives and mothers.

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  8. I was just reading through your blog, having found you through Modest Mom link up. I agree, I have had a lot of trouble finding any Titus 2 older ladies in our church and we go to a church with about 500 other people in it! I have a couple friends who are modest but no real convictions about dress, so to speak. No one else in our church home schools, just us. Our pastor's wife and both assistant pastors wives dress in skirts only but are quiet about it, no real instruction is talked about or mentoring, although 2 of them have a Sunday school class that they teach. There has to be a fine line between being prideful and preachy and then just teaching the right way. Some of these ladies in our church show cleaveage, wear short skirts, really embarassing clothing choices. I think through prayer, some of the older women could be a mentor and an example in a gentle right way. I just wonder if anyone cares anymore.

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