Sharing my race of life in faith, fitness, food and family ~ 1 Cor 9:24-27
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Modest dress dilemma
For anyone that might read this but doesn't know or remember my history with this issue, a couple years ago I decided to go to dresses/skirts only. At that time, I honestly felt that was what God was telling me to do. My dh supported me and we both agreed that it was not a command from God for women to wear skirts only but He did command women to dress modestly. I felt more modest in skirts and with much prayer and study, went to skirts full time. Fast forward to the past year or so, I have since stopped wearing skirts full time. I believe part of it is that we changed churches and I didn't feel the need to be such an obvious example of modesty in a place where modesty is definitely not a priority. Also, the women at our new church were examples of modesty, meekness and gentleness without being skirts only. So, I slowly relaxed my position on skirts only and now seldom wear them. However, my inner being still struggles with it occasionally (like anytime I allow myself to think upon it). I can't tell what God's will is for me in this area anymore. I honestly struggle back and forth. I can give reasons why either way of dress is ok. Now, granted, I still dress modestly when not in skirts. I don't wear low cut shirts, sleeveless shirts, shorts or short skirts. I also try to make sure my jeans/pants are not tight. I know sometimes I feel as if I draw more attention to myself when I am in a skirt, for example when we go to rodeos (which we do alot in summer). I don't really know if I do draw attention to myself in those instances of if it is just me being self conscious. Sometimes I feel that if I honestly didn't care at all what others around me thought, I would be skirts full time no matter what.But sometimes I wonder if I only want to wear skirts because of the image it conjures in my mind. When I see a woman in a long, flowing modest skirt, I see feminine loveliness. It gives me a feeling of biblical beauty and warmth. See, I'm struggling. Do you have thoughts or comments? I would appreciate prayers that God would show me His will in this.
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http://blessed-simplicity.blogspot.com/2009/08/great-article-on-modesty.html
ReplyDeleteI know you've read this blog entry I posted before, but thought I'd remind you of it. Also, a friend of mine recently did a post on modesty that you can find here...
http://blessingsamany.blogspot.com/2010/12/modesty.html
She also links to a good article on it. My personal views in addition just to wanting to be modest are that we are to be set apart from the world, and I don't feel that I'm set apart in just pants. There's more to it, but I'll let the articles speak for themselves. I'm praying for you!
I don't know you, but reading between the lines, what I'm hearing is that you know what dressing modestly is, but because of what you think people will think when they see you, you aren't doing it.
ReplyDeleteNeither should you dress in skirts and dresses only for what people will think of you! You need to dress modestly for what HE will think of you!!!
You say "When I see a woman in a long, flowing modest skirt, I see feminine loveliness. It gives me a feeling of biblical beauty and warmth." as if it's a bad thing. Why? What is wrong with seeing feminine loveliness? What is wrong with biblical beauty? God tells us to dress in a way that pleases Him, and in doing so it brings out our femininity and beauty. That is a good thing!
I didn't mean to make it sound like a bad thing to picture biblical beauty or feminine loveliness, I was just saying that is what it makes me think of. Yes, you are right in reading between the lines. Sometimes, I just have to talk it out to make myself see it. I had a thought the other day that also encouraged me: If God came back and I was wearing jeans, I would be embarassed. I know, He sees me all of the time anyway, but that was just a thought I had. So, I'm going to skirts most of the time. I can't say 100% of the time right now, but I am definitely led back to feminine modesty as I see it, in a skirt 90% of the time. Thank you for the comments and encouragement, and just for listening to me ramble.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Rashel
I am so appreciative that I found your blog. I am a born again Christian woman that seems to be struggling with a lot of things. I know what I should be doing but often cannot figure out how to make it happen. I dont worry about the condemnation of others, but some of the ways that I believe I should live and raise my children do not currently work for us financially. I have never made much effort to wear skirts, but more and more each day I am feeling guilty for not doing so. The financial issue is acquiring them and I am not a seamstress. Any ideas on where to get denim skirts that do not cost a fortune? I live in a rural environment and do not want to waste money on "nice" things to wear in the garden or to feed the animals. We have had a huge financial set back in the last year and are in debt way beyond our current means. I have been doing a lot of research on homeschooling and really want to take that route. It makes me almost sick everytime I drop my kids off at their current school. And my kids are very unhappy with their school environment. However, in order to pay our bills, my husband and I both have to work. I am concerned that the longer I wait to make the school change, the harder it will be on my kids to adjust. My husb has health issues that hinder him from getting a job that will cover our bills. I curr have a temp job, sell Avon, and am very frugal around the house, but we are still struggling to make it work. We have made some bad financial decisions in the past that we are still trying to correct.
ReplyDeleteI welcome any advice that you and your readers have to offer. I feel like I am drowning in my own bad decisions, and I know that we need to make changes. Thank you for allowing me to babble on and on!
Lana, I am praying for you and your family. That is my first suggestion to you is to pray and ask for God's help and His wisdom (which I'm sure you're probably already doing). I understand the desire to homeschool but have your children in public school, my oldest went to kindergarten. It is so hard. I am so thankful for your heart attitude of wanting to follow God and your being submissive to your husband.
ReplyDeleteAs for cheap skirts, when I first started wearing them, I found alot at garage sales and goodwill. Do you have a second hand store around you? It is very simple to turn a pair of jeans into a skirt and I'm not a seamstress either. I do have a sewing machine though, do you? I used to have a link for instructions on how to do it. I'll try to find it and post it. God knows your heart and your financial situation, honor Him in this as often as you can right now and He will be pleased. He understands.
As for finances, are there any jobs you can do from home so that you can be home with your children? Babysitting of course comes to mind, or cleaning houses for others. You may not be "home" to do that, but could work around it or take your children with you. Direct sales such as Avon is also helpful, I used to sell Pampered Chef when I first started staying home. I will think more on that as well. One more thing would be to consider a job with hours that your husband would be home, such as evening or night. I know that would be very difficult but I have heard of others doing that so they can keep their children home.
I will keep praying for you. I will also post anymore ideas I have as they come to me. Thank you for sharing with me and allowing me the chance to encourage you. Rely on God through this, He is faithful and loves you. Believe in your heart what you ask for in prayer and you will receive it. Mark 11:24
Blessings to you,
Rashel
Rashel,
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your words of encouragement and your dedicated prayer! Your response and your blog has been such a breath of fresh air. I do have a sewing machine and some good thrift stores a couple hours from us. I plan to make use of both. I have, also, seen a pattern for making skirts out of jeans and will be trying that as well. I had an interview for a decent job this week that I have a good feeling about. However, it is a 5-day a week position, so again I am not sure how to work in homeschooling but I am definitely praying about it. I am, also, praying that if this position is the path that God wants me to follow then will He allow it to be an opportunity for me to network with other Christian women and share his Word. I am trying to re-focus on being more self-sufficient in our lives rather than being so stressed out about our economical issues as well as our country's. Currently we make our own laundry soap, are shampoo-free, have gone paperless in the kitchen, are raising chickens and ducks, are planting a large garden, crocheting, some sewing, and the boys love to hunt (for food only). Please share any self-sufficiency ideas. Again, thank you so much for your servant's heart!
God bless you,
Lana
Lana, I pray God does lead you in His will regarding the job. I'm proud of you for relying on Him and finding your strength in Him. You already have a lot of ideas on being self sufficient, some of which we haven't even implemented yet (although we should). I'll try to find some ideas you might not have thought of and I'll post them soon. You might also check out this blog - homesteadinghomemaker.blogspot.com She has a bunch of ideas for frugal meals that are very helpful. I'm so glad to hear from you again. Please continue to keep me up to date :)
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Rashel
Rashel, I could have wrote this myself... and I actually DID a few days ago on MY blog! Glad to know I'm not the only one who flip flops! When you get a chance check out my blog www.boysandbutterflies.blogspot.com
ReplyDeleteBecky